More Pissed

5:30am

I would like to start off by remembering just how selfish this guy is. He'd rather live in a tent with his kid and worry about how he's going to put food in his mouth rather than let him go be with family and risk not seeing him for awhile. And here I thought the guy had a brain and some common sense.

I'm never doubting my instincts again. I was right to walk home and not take him with me three months ago. Obviously he wouldn't have stayed and I'd be a hundred times worse off.

I was reminded this morning of just how awesome my instincts are. My mom never took back her bank card and it was laying on the counter as I was leaving for my paper route. Even though there's really no reason to expect it to be stolen, I decided to grab it and throw it in my purse as I went out the door. When I got to town and came upon the gas station, I decided to look down and sure enough, for the first time, my uncle left me with an empty tank!!! So glad that I did not have to go back home.

So yea, even though this guy appears to have everything I want, look at how much he hurt me without even being with me. Sure, I didn't jump at the chance to be with him but it only took me three days to let a friend know and tell him that I wanted him and he was welcome (I did not actually contact him myself.....I'm not a homewrecker). And he's done nothing but run for three months while also having the balls to contact me and feed me bullshit. We've never even looked each other in the eyes or even kissed.....yet he's made me cry for ten weeks now. I've had my heart broken probably fifty times and he did it too without even being with me. So really, why would I give him a chance to hurt me even more??

I'd rather spend another five years alone and crying over loneliness. It's a proven fact that everyone has at least seven twins. One of his is out there, I will find him, he will see my worth and he will never let me down. I'm so lucky, I'm sure he will be from Boston also, the 'witch' capitol that celebrates everything I believe. Plus, I want a man with an accent. So see, I do know what I want, it's just that I let boys confuse me and make me forget.

"Bad Blood" Taylor Swift

Yea, all the good guys I've picked, ran away. YOU not only ran, you made sure to let me know you're not at all what you appear to be.