Owls

7:04am

I was so lost in my thoughts this morning and I heard a lot of newer songs that have been in almost every list so far. For today, I mostly only added new ones, well, ones I haven't added to any of my lists anyway. The first two where the ones I heard on my way to town but it's Sunday and I was alone. I had 14 bundles this morning. I saw lots of deer, quite a few fawns and young buck. I drove slow, they were all playing in the roads. Be careful out there.

I was mostly thinking about my blog post the other day. Did you see the really angry one I posted for two days?? I've unpublished it for now, I'm still not ready to understand all that and I don't know what's ok to put up here. Hopefully when my tumor comes out, I will understand my own emotions better. If you did see it, I would like to say that I spent most of my morning thinking about that red head.

Because he did stop by....that very day.

He dropped off my girl friend and came back to pick her up two hours later. He didn't come in, he's not The One. She sat here and talked about guys and unknowingly let me know who it is.

The red head has been around to remind me of what happened between us. I had a crush on him in high school, one of many....however, the only red head I thought was cute. But I was nothing to him. I was a nerd and a freak. Five years ago, I went to my fav dive bar alone and drank too much. Later in the evening, that red head came in and was immediately enthralled with my pink hair. He loved it and started up the first convo we ever had. He was my hero that night and took me home with him. We talked, laughed, smoked and cuddled. I can't remember but I think he took me for breakfast in the am. I know he ended up taking me on a few dates around Danville.

We had fun and things were going well.....till his recently estranged wife started harassing me. Back then, you could allow anyone to write on your Facebook wall and I never had a problem till her. She threatened to come to my work and kick my ass. She said she would find out where I live, I think she even said that she would kill me once. Of course, I blocked her. Then had to block a couple of her friends also. Five years later, they are still blocked. I also felt like he was being paranoid and hiding something from me so I stopped seeing him. I am the Truth, I can't lie, I won't lie and I can't be around people who are dishonest in any way

Now I have to tell you about Sweetie. In November 2011, we were thinking about getting cat number four. My daughter was upset that the three we had, follow me and fight to be in my bed. She wanted one of her own. It was almost her bday and I was thinking about adopting one that I saw at PetSmart. She was beautiful but $100. My daughter loved her and begged. I said to let me think about it until her party the next weekend and see if we have enough money left.

Well, that week, on November 15, the day after my daughter's bday, she walked to Pop-pops after school and there was a cat sitting on the porch. And yes, it looked exactly like the one at PetSmart. When I got home from work, my daughter met me at the car and said "mom, the universe brought me a bday kitty, I named her Sweetie and I'm walking her home right now and you can't say no"

Well this cat loves my daughter and sleeps with her almost every night. Except for the last two summers. Last summer, we had to go get her from Pop-pops a few times. She would be confused and scared and run away from us. We kept her locked in for two weeks after the third time and she stayed until this past summer.

This time, she went next door and started following around my neighbor W

My daughter was pretty upset until earlier this week, when it started getting cold out. Sweetie has been staying here, at home.

I'm telling you because, Friday morning, Oct 2, a few hours before I saw the train on my paper route, Sweetie was in. She jumped on my stove, which she rarely ever does, Tiger loves to but she knows better. She spilled spaghetti sauce all over my kitchen. I now have a big red stain on my floor.

I think I'm hearing "Renegades" and "Ex's & Oh's" way too much, thinking about "Kashmir" for a reason and I'm afraid of being here, in this house for a reason. I'm remembering how much I love to travel, how much I don't like being around the same people all the time, that I love change, I'm a great navigator, investigator....I'm good at a lot and I'm here to help people.

I love my RV idea. I want to help as many people as I can and I do it best by letting them see me. My daughter has thought about it and she loves the idea. She hasn't seen much of the World. My family left me a lot of junk to get rid of, there are people out there who want it and want to meet me. I know where there is a cheap RV

I can bring you luck in money and love but not for myself. I can get just about any thing I want by thinking about it, except True Love and money. Many people love me, therefore I know that one day I will get to feel and experience true love. But I think I need to get out there and find him so that I can save my self. Please wish for me, pray for me, think good thoughts for me....whatever works for you, works for me. I just need some positive vibes to find the money I need. I thank you in advance and want to remind you that if your heart is still beating, some one out there loves you and is looking for you. I Wish YOU a Beautiful and Blessed day.

I know I will have a great day because when I walked across the driveway this morning to deliver my best friends papers (she gets all the leftover coupons).....I heard four owls talking this morning. First one was in the West, then I heard one South, then West again, then I heard one from the East. Then West again, then one came from the North, near the power pole at the top of the driveway.

HMM...sounds to me like the West is calling and maybe my Uncle is right, I just might need a pistol, huh?? :))