"Last Resort"

7:27pm

I was looking for that song months ago, when some one was making me think about suicide. I'm still sad, very unhappy with life but of course, I would never hurt myself. As I said then, I never have before, just that one week. I still think about death and often wish I could die but I want to fall asleep and never wake up or something like that. Quick and painless would be great. Unfortunately nothing has changed. I'm still being forced to think about Boston and my psychic abilities but not getting help or guidance. I'm not ok with it anymore, I'm confused, lost, crying and not giving a shit now. I'm so lonely, every one is busy and I'm still alone. I'm trying to be positive, everything else is pretty good. I'm thinking how time has been going fast the last few weeks so it won't be long before I have money to adopt a dog. It seems the Universe only wants to give me cats so I will have to go find my own dog, huh?? It sucks, I was so close to having two different dogs, I wish I had one now. I need a cuddle buddy, even if they can't talk. Maybe it's better that way, I've been hurt enough, a dog will only love me

"All Along The Watchtower" Jimi Hendrix (only other song I listened to this morning)